Another Culinary Catastrophe

It happened again.

Another culinary catastrophe.

Great idea. Great recipe. Great intentions. But not enough time to do it justice. And then there was the accident.

Here's what happened....

My friend Lorraine over at The Copywriters' Kitchen posted an excellent recipe for Chicken Teriyaki. After reading her post, I couldn't stop thinking about that dish. I HAD to make it last night.

Of course, making this particular dish would necessitate a trip to the grocery. No problem. I could stop by on my way home after school. The recipe was simple enough and I should have plenty of time to get it on and have it ready for dinner.

Well, you know me... I can't follow a recipe verbatim. I always change things up. And for this recipe I planned to prepare it in a crock pot. See, we had the final Mass last night for the kids' PSR (Parish School of Religion - sometimes known as CCD). I figured I could get everything in the pot and let it cook for about 4 hours, so that it would be ready once we got home around 8.

I am terrible with time. No sense of it at all. So, the grocery took longer than I thought. Getting everything in the crock pot took longer than I thought. And I didn't have time to put the rice on before leaving for church. We use brown rice, so it takes a good 45 minutes to cook.

As I sat in Mass, a fear began to gnaw at me: it's not going to be ready. It's not going to be ready and everybody is starving... and Char will be upset because we will have another late night. I felt the darkness closing in.

But then... a ray of hope! I had an idea. I would go home, transfer the Chicken Teriyaki to an All-Clad pot and rev up the stove. Surely it will be done by the time the rice is ready. And another ray of hope - Mass ended 45 minutes earlier than I thought it would. Perfect! The day is saved, I thought.

But the day wasn't saved.

We got home. I put the rice on. I revved up the stove. Put the All-Clad pot in the sink so that it would be easier to pour the contents of the crock pot into it. I began the transfer. Everything went well until I went to set the crock pot down on the edge of the sink. I guess I set it down too hard. It cracked into about 5 pieces! I felt so disappointed... awful.

I checked and I didn't see any crock pot particles in the food, so I put it on the stove. And, voila! In 45 minutes we were ready to eat! And it was delicious!

Now, I was upset about the crock pot. I had pulled it out of the pantry a few days earlier, and I was planning to use it frequently over the next few weeks.

Not any more. Bummer.

And guess what else... There were crock pot fragments in the food. I chomped down on a goodly-sized piece. Checked the pot again. Sure enough, I found more pieces. Now I was angry. I am sure there were tiny pieces, or flakes, that we ate. I am not happy about that. More disappointment.

Lorraine, it tasted great! I love the recipe and I will make it again. But next time I will follow your recipe to a T.

If you have been reading, or listening to, The Catholic Foodie for while, you may remember that I posted a culinary catastrophe before. I called it The Spud Dud. You may want to check that one out too. It shows how terrible I can be in the kitchen.

Do you have a culinary catastrophe story you would like to share? Leave a comment here.

The Spud Dud

Well, this is my first food-related post and it's about a culinary failure!

Last night I baked potatoes. We have been dealing with sick children for the last couple of weeks, and I figured we needed to eat some comfort food. A hot, stuffed baked potato sounded like the perfect thing. Problem was... it's been years since I've baked a potato.

In my recollection, it takes about an hour or so for potatoes to bake. But I didn't want to chance it, so I headed for Google to look it up. The first couple of hits offered the recipes for "perfect" baked potatoes. It may sound crazy to look up a recipe for baked potatoes, but, like I said, I didn't want to take any chances. We needed some serious comfort!

I cleaned the potatoes, pierced them, coated them in olive oil, and sprinkled them with kosher salt. I threw them in the oven baked them at 350F. I set the timer for one hour and started cooking the bacon, preparing the salad, and getting out all the fixings. I had planned this so that the potatoes would come out right when my wife got home from tutoring.

Wife came home, the timer went off, and I checked the potatoes. They were hard. Like bricks. Uh-oh. And the family was ready to eat.

I reset the timer for 30 minutes. I tossed the salad and heated up leftover chicken. I served the family dinner, but I did not eat. I continued to check the potatoes every 15 minutes for another hour. Finally, they were ready. That sweet baked potato smell permeated the kitchen and dining room. I felt happy. Briefly.

I announced that the potatoes were ready, only to discover that the kids were in bed and my wife was getting ready for bed. Not good. I needed comfort food more than ever! So I sat at the table, alone, with a piping hot baked potato stuffed with butter, sour cream, bacon and cheddar. I would have preferred to have my family with me. But, apparently, I bought really big potatoes!

Next time, I will allow more time for baking... or buy smaller potatoes!